40 Ways to Annoy Edward Cullen

Someone sent this to us in an email once and we haven't really gotten to putting it up until now. So here you go:

1. Give yourself a paper cut and make a point of showing him the blood, then put it in your mouth and say "Mmmmm, delicious!! Want some?"
2. Use vampire expressions like, "Holy Dracula!" and "Goodbye sweet Transylvania."
3. Ask him to help you do something impossible. (Save the world, build an atomic clock, etc.) Then when he can't, say, "Oh nevermind. I'm sure Jacob could help me."
4. Volunteer him for a blood drive.
5. Hold up a bottle of ketchup and say, "Look! BLOOOOOD!!!"
6. Throw him to a horde of crazy fan girls
7. Tie Bella to some railroad tracks. When he gets mad, say, "Wow, a little overprotective aren't we?"
8. Ask him, "Hey! Aren't you the at one guy from Harry Potter?"
9. Repetedly mention that he's not a real vampire.
10. Suggest that his life is too stressful. Recommend aromatherapy.
11. Leave bloody, dead animals laying around. Insist that you're helping him with his aromatherapy.
12. Kidnap Bella. When he asks where she is, nonchelantly say, "Don't worry about it."
13. When he talks about how much he loves Bella, ask, "Aren't you a little young to know what love is? Maybe you should wait until you're a few years older."
14. Run over his Volvo with Bella's truck.
15. Read the back of the Twilight books to him. Bonus points for using a dramatic announcer voice.
16. Visualize his life in 20 years. SUV, suburban house, 12 kids.
17. Laugh when Bella trips...loudly.
18. Ask him where he gets his body glitter.
19. Suggest self-tanner
20. Point out the circles unde his eyes. Tell him to get more sleep.
21. Offer to lend him your concealer.
22. Withdraw the offer. Tell him that he's too pale for this shade.
23. Tell him that we're getting tired of his "scary" act.
24. Redecorate his room with Care-Bears.
25. Wear tin-foil on your head. When he asks why, tell him that it's to keep him from reading your mind.
26. Pour ketchup on Bella
27. Plant dasies in his house.
28. Push Bella in front of a bus
29. Whenever he comes into a room, start mentally singing the 'Gilligan's Island' theme song.
30. Take Bella shopping. "Accidentally" leave her at the mall.
31. Take all of his CD's. Replace them with every single Disney soundtrack.
32. Roll in glitter and run around screaming, "Look at me! I'm Edward! I'm Edward!"
33. Write him love poems and sign them from Jacob.
34. Give him your divorce attorney's card. Tell him it's "Just in case."
35. Diagnose him randomly. "Maybe you're just an insomniac." "You look anemic. Have you been eating enough red meat?" "Maybe it's a vitamin D deficiency."
36. Invite small children to his house for 'scary story time.'
37. Paint his room pink.
38. Wave wooden crosses and strings of garlic at him randomly. When he asks you what you're doing, say, "I read this works somewhere."
39. Mail him a llama. When he asks why, ask, "Why not?"
40. Call him Eddy...all the time.

How Twilight Should Have Ended

www.howitshouldhaveended.com/videos


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Cick on Twilight
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Please Help Us!!!!!

Ron Curtis needs your help!

We need help thinking of ideas to put up on Ihatedwardcullen-ed.blogspot!!! Apparently we don't hate it enough to think of new posts as often as we would like. So if you have any ideas whatsoever, email us at Ihatedwardcullen@gmail.com. Anything is appreciated and every email will be considered. Thank you.

Extremely Ugly People That Are Somehow Slightly More Attractive Than Edward:

1. Amy Winehouse
2. Justin Bieber
3. Gene Simmons
4. Hulk Hogan
5. Tom Shane
6. Perez Hilton
7. Snoop Dogg
8. Michael Jackson (Eh, they are about the same)
   
9. Lady Gaga
10. Richard Simmons
11. Clay Aiken
12. Chris Cornell
13. Travis Barker
14. Elijah Wood
15. Carrot Top
16. Marilyn Manson
17. Jack Black
18. Jocelyn Wildenstein
    
19. Michael Berryman
20. Marty Feldmen
    
21. Clint Eastwood
    
22. Iggy Pop
23. Dee Snyder
    
24. Flava Flave
25. Tom Cruise
26. Trent Reznor
27. Chester Bennington
28. Mike Dirnt
29. Gerrard Way
30. Bono
31. Patrick Stump
32. Lindsay Lohan
33. Tim McIlrath
34. Adam Lambert
35. Weird Al "Yankovic
    

Ugly By Edward

He uses it every day, but do you see a difference? I didn't think so!

Dear readers,
We, Ron Curtis are very sorry for an inconvenience that will soon be put into affect tomorrow. We, Ron Curtis will not be able to update the blog as much as we do now. It breaks our heart to know that we are causing unhappiness to our readers and viewers. But we will not be in the same computer class and will have no time to think of posts! We will try our hardest to communicate our ideas to each other. Please forgive us!!!

-P.S. we ask a favor of you all! Please tell anyone and everyone about his amazing blog and suggest they become followers! Also we ask that you continue to vote on polls and comment on our posts. Thank you and continue to enjoy your lives as we, Ron Curtis continue to destroy Edward Cullen once and for all! ihatedwardcullen-ed.blogspot.com shall forever live!

Spare Time

What Edward Cullen does in his spare time:

• Plays the glockenspiel
• Listens to Shane co. advertisements
• Plays dress up
• Gardens
• Dances ballet
• Fanatasizes about being in the Limehouse Tiger
• Models Leotards
• Dreams about being a fairy
• Raises llamas
• Sings opera
• Cans tomatoes
• Sews tapestries
• Practices embroidery
• Carves soap
• Strokes his puppy name Phyllis
• Goes to the market and purchases basil
• Goes to his clergy and cries on the couch
• Sculpts his eyebrows
• Experiments with his makeup
• Applies anti-aging cream (that's not working out so well)
• Pretends he is a jedi and practices his lightsaber sounds
• Polishes his tiaras
• Pracitices for his role on "Ugly Betty"(soon to be called "Ugly Edward")
• Watches his recorded episodes of "Oprah"
• Makes fruit loop necklaces
• Sings along with Mary Poppins
• In the process of creating his own line of makeup
• Sketches dress designs
• Watches Hannah Montana and wishes he could act so flawlessly like her
• Admires his rare collection of unicorn horns
• Explores Princess Valley
• Stays on the computer for hours searching for Jonas Brothers tickets